Weddings

I was reminiscing the other day (I seem to have a problem seeing as I do this a lot) about the first wedding I ever went to. My train of memories came from a year just passed filled with lovebirds tying the knot and the upcoming happy days for even more smitten couples. In light of that, I decided, mainly due to a relentless writer's itch, to recall from memory my first wedding. Also depending on how long this urge lasts or unless the people demand it, I may just recall the other weddings I have had the honor of attending.

I truly love weddings. I love them because they are a picture of a couple's two lives becoming one, because they are part of a great commitment, because music fills the air, food my stomach, and joy in many people's hearts. I get to witness one maybe two (if I know both the bride and groom) of my friends making the lifelong commitment and share in their joyous day after watching them fall deeper in love over the years. There's so much more I could say, but right now I'm going to focus on the first wedding I ever went to.

I was maybe eight years old at the time and I always wondered what it would be like to actually go to a wedding. To experience all the beauty of the scenery that was made possible by the careful planning of the couple and all the ones they hired to make the day evermore grand. Well I finally got my chance. The local church I met with when I lived in Pennsylvania wasn't very big so it was a big thing when new people joined. It was even bigger when they wanted to hold their wedding right on the property and it wasn't even a "church" building. For those of you who went on that bike trip to Gettysburg 10 years ago (yes it's been that long), recall that we camped at Al and Sue Gilbert's house, which was a dome house that Al built. That's where the wedding was held. As a kid, back then I thought it was strange to have a wedding there, but looking back on it, it was actually a beautiful and perfect place. There were hardly any neighbors, a small country road with less than 1% traffic, a hill that gave a nice view of the corn fields, the woods, and the summer sun eclipsing the house's large dome. Now here's where my memory gets a little foggy. I cannot remember how they came to be with us, nor when they moved away. But I do remember that day nearly to the T.

I hated dressing up (and I still do to some extent...ties *cough*), but a part of my 8 year old self was excited about wearing a nice pair of shoes and looking pretty slick for an 8 year old. I remember watching the days before as the sisters labored, especially my mom, to make the wedding cake. They also made all the decorations and prepared the beautiful arbor. The whole church had placed a lot of effort into making this day extra special.

Before I go into more details, let me give you a little background on the couple.Their names were Juan and Gloria. They were both Hispanic. The groom had been married once before and had at least three kids in their teens and above. I think she may have been married once as well. She was soft spoken and he was a talker. They both loved Christ.

The ceremony was to take place around 5pm in the afternoon. We had to be there earlier for final preparations. I was totally okay with that because I liked being the first one there and greeting people as they arrive (I still kind of do). I recall being outside most of the time, enjoying the warm summer sun and the scenic masterpiece before me. Every once in awhile, I tried to go upstairs to see what my mom was doing, but I kept getting shooed away because she and the other sisters were helping the bride with her wedding dress. Two o'clock rolled around and some of the guests started to arrive. I was given the job of helping park the cars and since the driveway wasn't big enough, we had the cars drive across the yard and park down behind the cornfield. Everything was going smoothly, until Pandora's box began to once again open. Joe Pope from the church in Pittsburgh was the minister for this wedding and he called us, telling us that his van had broken down two hours away. A brother by the name of Ned Beck hopped in has old Porsche and went to rescue him. Now remember that this was the late 1990s and cell phones weren't popular/ affordable yet. He did however take a cheap phone with him. That issue was the least of our worries, however. The groom and his family were nowhere to be found.

An hour went by and a few guests came. All I could do was stand by a nearly empty country road and hope a car would drive in so I could help park it. Then a bit of good news came our way. Joe had gotten his van fixed and was nearly here. We tried to reach Ned, but he wasn't answering. So everyone did what they could to put the final touches before the ceremony began. Another hour passed and Ned finally called saying he was in Breezewood, but couldn't find Joe. Joe had just arrived and we told Ned to come back. I felt bad for him having to drive four hours round trip for nothing and he was likely going to miss the start of the wedding. Another two hours passed and the sun began to dip ever so slowly beyond the horizon. Ned came rolling in and seeing that the wedding hadn't started, he said to me "You didn't start without me huh?" I told him that the groom hadn't arrived.

One more hour ticked away and I thought that my first wedding experience was going to be a bust. But then, in the distance, I saw a pair of headlights. Then another. And another. A whole train of cars came down that gravel country road and with joy I ran into the house shouting that the groom had finally arrived! Two+ hours late might I add. Within the hour, everyone was parked, seated and now facing Joe and the groom standing under the arbor on the hilltop in Al and Sue's backyard.

The heat of the day was fading, a cool breeze was blowing, and the ceremony finally began. The wedding party began to come out. Leading the way was the groom's dashing young nephew, strumming a beautiful tune on his guitar in his native tongue. Following him were more relatives and friends, all with beaming smiles. Then, the one we were all waiting for , the bride made her presence known. There she was in a stunning, flowing, ruby red dress (yes I did say ruby). I was shocked because my eight-year-old self thought all wedding dresses were supposed to be white. Disappointment was nowhere to be found, but instead an abundance of mirth.

Once she had reached the arbor, a hush fell over the crowd as Joe Pope began to speak. He spoke from the bible and spoke the truth. Right before the vows, the attendees were given the opportunity to share testimonies (another thing I never thought would happen at a wedding). Guest after guest stood to declare how amazing God was in bringing the two of them together. The couple then swapped rings, exchanged vows, and at Joe's beckoning, they became husband and wife. Cheers went up as the two now exited the scene as one.

Because there were a lot of people and it was a summer's eve, dinner (even though it was late) was held outdoors by candle light. I got to sit with some of the relatives, including the guitar player. While waiting to be called into the line, he and his buddy were arguing about what keeps the candle burning. His friend said wick, but he insisted on it being the wax. They asked me what I thought and  said the wick much to his friend's delight. He kept saying "No man, it's definitely the wax." After dinner had ended, everyone gathered inside for the last event which was the cutting of the cake. Now there was an inside joke that Juan's (the groom) family multiplied like rabbits. So my mom and the other sisters had bought a bride and groom rabbit figurine and stuck it on to top the cake. Juan didn't notice at first, but as he was about to cut the cake, my mom asked him if he saw what was on it. He said "Oh yeah there are two-" then he stopped himself finally noticing the rabbits, shook his head at the joke, and the crowd busted out laughing.

By this time it was well after 9pm. The guests said their "congrats" and "goodbyes" as they began to return home. The rest of us who had helped put this wonderful day together collapsed on the chairs, couches, and whatever else we could relax on. I was tired and my feet hurt. But I was happy and thankful. My first wedding experience was everything I hoped it would be and more.

New Year New Hope

It becomes harder and harder to not be repetitive  with these new year posts each year. I don't want to bore you all with the same old stories, the same dreams I've posted time and time again, etc. So I'm going to do a mixture of things instead. Before I go into detail, here are a few things I enjoyed from this past year.

Kenny Chesney Lyrics (new and old):

"Talked a good game when we were out with the guys 
But in the back seat we were awkward and shy 
Girls were a mystery that we couldn't explain 
And I guess there are some things that are never gonna change"~Young

"Sometimes when the sun goes down

Shadows fall across this little town
And I close my eyes and I drift away
to another place in another time
When the world was ours and she was mine
I dream of holdin' her again someday"~On the Coast of Somewhere Beautiful

"It ain't fair you died too young

Like a story that had just begun
The death tore the pages all away
God knows how I miss you
All the hell that I've been through
Just knowing no one could take your place
Sometimes I wonder who you'd be today"~Who You'd Be Today

"Its what the junkie needs that the needle cant give 

depressed and forgotten are praying for it 
Its what the brave and courageous are fighting for 
An open sail on a distant shore-Freedom"~Freedom

"From that chair I've caught a few fish and some rays

And I've watched boats sail in and out of cinnamon bay
I let go of a lover that took a piece of my heart
Prayed many times for forgiveness and a brand new start"~Old Blue Chair

"Wouldn't take much for me to up and run

To another life somewhere in the sun"~Somewhere in the Sun

"There's something sexy about the rain

She said as it came pouring down
It feels like kisses on my skin
She spread her arms and spun around
In a summer island storm
In a field of sugarcane
She taught me how and showed me why
There's something sexy about the rain"~There's Something Sexy About the Rain

"See, I gained a little on Father Time

When me and her, had our first big fight
I said some things, I made her cry
She packed all her stuff

The boy in me said let her go
But the man in me said pull her close
It was time to find out which one I was
Standing in a doorway holding on to love
That's where I grew up"~Where I Grew Up

"I could jump on some ol' highway

Run a thousand miles or more
Unlock some hidden mystery
Behind a distant door
I could sail the seven oceans
Til I crawl upon some long forgotten shore

But it's always gonna be you
Always gonna be you I'm lookin' for"~Always Gonna Be You

"I've been right and I've been wrong

Somewhere in between for so long
Live the night, miss the light, and I've been shown it
Life has it's way of keepin' you strong, don't it?"~Don't It

"Many years of summers, and I hope it never ends

Been down so many highways, full of twists and turns and bends
We caught lightning in a bottle, somehow we survived it all
All the stories he could tell, if this bus could talk

As I leave the stage, still high from your applause
He'd tell you that I love you
If this bus could talk"~If This Bus Could Talk

Bonus Luke Bryan Lyrics: 

"Funny how the good ones go

Too soon, but the good Lord knows
The reasons why, I guess

Sometimes the greater plan
Is kinda hard to understand
Right now it don't make sense
I can't make it all make sense

So long my friend
Until we meet again
I'll remember you
And all the times that we used to...

... sit right here on the edge of this pier
And watch the sunset disappear"

The reason I put this last set of lyrics here is because one of the few cons of 2014 was that six people in my life had taken their last breaths. I would love to describe their lives in great detail, but for this post, I don't have the time. So instead I'll give you a snippet of who they were to me. 

Kim Gilbert (54, January): Best friend's aunt, sister in Christ, cared for me as she did her nephew growing up.

Jim Martin (60s, February): Brother in Christ, loved being with the brothers, always said hello and asked me how I was.

Elise Rainville (23, June): Childhood friend, adventurous, loved the snow, people, and Christ. Always had a bright beautiful smile. Life verse: "Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves."~Philippians 2:3

Shirley Leer (70s, October): Great Aunt, cared for us when we stayed at their house in Chicago on our way to and from Wisconsin back in the day, made amazing brownies and had an electric personality.

Brian Brickner (52, November): Fisherman/Fisher of men, funny, extremely caring, loved Christ, the saints, and the church, family man, and a wonderful man of God.

John Schneider (68, December): Brother in Christ, my two time group leader for Ignite, adventurous, cared for the saints, the church, and his family, Vietnam veteran, hero, friend.

The light at the end of this tunnel is that they all knew and loved Christ. I will see them again one day.

2014 opened with part two of a brutal winter and I somehow survived another semester of engineering. The Sochi winter Olympics took place this year and they were a real treat. Witnessing team USA beat Russia in the round robin hockey, Kotsenburg win the first US Gold in a new event, the spirit of the games, and so much more.

The summer came and I welcomed it with open arms...except I had to work for most of it, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. My patriotism swelled again as the World Cup took place and the battle cry "I Believe That We Will Win!" rang throughout. The US put up a brilliant fight and made it out of the group of death, only to fall to Belgium in the first knockout round. I have hope for 2018. Get Ready.

Vision Week and Mountain Top were so good and so filled with Christ, grilling and chilling with the bros and saints, and weddings galore! Six weddings and I had the privilege of attending four. There's so much to say, but I already have a separate piece in the works about those, so instead congrats once again to Peter & Yitao (March), Mark & Esther (May), Dan & Anastasia (June), Paul & Sarah (August), Jeremy & Kayla (September), and Julian & Marilyn (September).

My family vacation to Wisconsin was a much needed relaxing, fun, blast. I got to see family, be in the great outdoors with wildlife not known to Cleveland, fish till my heart was content, drive a pontoon boat out into the middle of the lake, anchor it, blare country music, and jump off it into the lake while watching the sun set beneath a raging storm on the horizon, saw my first demolition derby, and ate some delicious food including the mess of fish me and my brothers caught during the week.

Being in the Body of Christ means being connected with so many amazing believers across the USA. But because of distance and time, I don't get to see many of them often. That's why I treasure the times we have and this year procured a college conference in March, a spring conference in April, Vision Week in July, the Labor Day conference in September, the Great Lakes Regional Conference in Oct/Nov, and the just finished Winter vision week. It's hard to put even some details from each one here because each one was so rich, so Christ-filled, and such a beautiful picture of a blended, happy, church life.

In December, I got tired of waiting for adventures to come to me and decided to take one of my own. I drove 10 hours to Boston and back by myself to see an old friend I hadn't seen in 11 years. To discover this trip in detail, please read my previous post. In light of all this, I am determined to pack my summer with loads of adventures as well as serving the church and yp at the summer events.

I could put so much more here, but I think this post sums 2014 up pretty well (for my experience anyway). I purposely did not talk about news stories, celebrity news, movies, etc because I wanted this post to be more about how I experienced 2014 and less of how the world experienced it (the Olympics and world cup happen every 4 years and they appeal to my patriotic pride so they made the cut, and I only focused on Kenny's lyrics that really inspire me, move me, and meet me where I'm at; I said nothing about him).

I didn't get this out as early as I liked because time just isn't on my side anymore. I also apologize for the length, but hey if you can read a novel, then this is a piece of cake. I applaud you if you made it this far (without skipping the Chesney lyrics). So on that note, I publicly say auf wiedersehen to 2014 and hola 2015! I pray that the Lord continues to do great things in my life, in your lives, and in the lives of those who meet Him for the first time. I pray that we can all cast our anxieties, our dreams, our pain, our hope, our lack, and our love all upon Him in this new year. He was, He is, and He always will be! May Jesus Christ be with us all.

Bonus quote for the new year: They told me I couldn't swing for the fences, so I swung for the stars.

Boston

What would cause a man to drive 10 hours both ways, by himself, to Boston and back while putting 1300 miles on his car? What would possess him to spend the near $200 in gas and tolls for a little over 24 hour stay? And out of all months, why in the beginning of winter in December? Could it be he has a lady friend? Yes that must be it. There is nothing that'll make a man do such crazy feats like love...to quote Dwight Schrute "false".

The real reason? I have a buddy in the Navy stationed up there. He was one of my close childhood friends whom I haven't seen in eleven years. In March, he'll be shipped out for schooling to Texas. Peace out Boston. After all I've been through this past year, I felt compelled to make the trip to see him before Texas comes a calling.

I'm young, single, and have an untamed beast living in me known as adventure. I've never been to Massachusetts and one of my bucket list items is to visit all 50 United States. Experiencing Boston was also a great idea. Minus the 10 hour drive there and back, Boston traffic, and its peculiar maze of roads.

So what did I do? I used the subway system to cross the Atlantic (because my friend lived on an island part of Boston) and began to explore. Now the thing about Boston is that many of the streets are still cobblestone from the old days. Here's a history lesson for you. My great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather was named Thomas A. White. Now he was not a well known figure in history, but if you wonder where all my patriotic pride came from, I wouldn't be surprised it was from him. He was one of the main participants in the Boston Tea Party and also fought in the Revolutionary war. So my roots in this country lead back to Boston. If you google his name there's a wikipedia page on him as well as a few sites of his ancestors (like me) who are connecting each other (and there are a lot because the man had 21 kids after all!). I also passed by a right where the Boston Massacre happened.

I explored the more modern aspects like the aquarium (those pics are on facebook), as well as the city's light show on their Christmas tree, a long building that has food franchises from end to end, and a little of the MIT campus. Since the trip was semi spontaneous, I didn't get to see as much as I liked, but maybe a warmer season will have those opportunities in view (a.k.a. a Red Sox's game at Fenway).

I ended up leaving a day early because the Navy had my buddy stay overnight so I wouldn't have seen him again before I left anyway. In all honesty, when I went I was hoping to reminisce on our childhood, swap stories, and make some new ones. But 11 years is a long time and God didn't bless everyone with a strong memory. At least he's one of the few who remember me.

My trip was worth it, no matter how short. I have no idea when I'll see him again if ever. But this I will say. If I have ever called you friend in my life, I think about you from time to time, relieve old memories, and have not and will not ever forget you. No matter where this crazy life takes me, you'll be on my heart always because you did, do, and will always still matter to me. Boston Strong.

Remembering Brian Brickner

I had another post in the works, but after the recent and tragic passing of Brian Brickner, I felt moved and compelled to do this post instead.

For those who haven't been following my blog, or have missed some posts, 2014 has been a little rougher on me than usual. Ignoring all my school issues, Mr. B. is the 5th person in my life who has passed this year and the third under the age of 55. A week ago I received a message that threw me for a loop because I thought someone else I knew (who is around Mr. B's age) had passed, but it turned out to be that person's father who was 96 years old. I felt relief that it wasn't someone I knew well who played a small part in my growing up in the church, but still a loss of life is still hard to take. Just as I was getting my bearings straight, I got the news that Mr. B. had passed in a car accident. Let's just say my emotions have been like a roller coaster and I can't even begin to imagine what his wife and kids are going through. Before I get any sadder, I want to remember a man who even though I only knew for four years, had a profound impact on many lives including mine. Kenny Chesney once said "I think we all have somebody in our life that dies young, and it's hard to figure out why, and that can make such an impact that no matter how busy you are and what you're doing in life, it can stop you in your life and change you."

I first met his oldest daughter about seven years ago at a young people's event and saw this young christian full of life and full of Christ. I met her older brother a few years later and then her younger sister a year after that. Each one holds a place in my heart and life and I'm proud to call all three of them friends and even family in Christ. Knowing Mr. B's kids really made me want to meet the man who produced three wonderful children, now lovely adults. I finally got the privilege in the fall of 2010. We were hosting a young people's event by taking the kids paint balling. Mr. B. came with the group from Mansfield and I thought that he was there to drive the kids. Little did I know that this almost 50 something was going to be out on the field shooting and getting shot with paint. For those who haven't played paintball, it requires energy and a certain level of pain endurance because paint balls sting. During the last battle, it was a free for all/every man/woman for themselves. I made an early alliance and used that alliance to pick off three people. Then, I went lone wolf and crept around a corner. As I peered around it, I saw Mr. B. trying to camouflage himself. Being in the heat of the battle, I started firing and didn't stop until I saw his hands come up (which in reality was four shots) and two got him. Later I felt bad and went to apologize for being aggressive. He just laughed said don't worry about it and we introduced ourselves, talked and joked for awhile, before heading back to our respective cities.

As the years rolled on, I saw him on and off at a few church events, but didn't really have any interactions again until July of 2013. His daughter Sarah was hosting a birthday party for her then fiance and now husband Paul at her parent's house in Lexington. Mr. B. was more than happy to open his home to a bunch of college and graduated kids as well as take a handful of us out on his pontoon boat. I believe one of his greatest joys was making others happy and feel welcome. At one point during the event, he asked for some help to carry a grill across the neighborhood because theirs wasn't working. He cracked a few jokes about four strange men "stealing" a grill, but the neighbors knew we were borrowing it. Being a fisherman myself, I was also able to swap some stories with him about our passion.

One of the last times I saw him, was my most memorable of all. He was with us when we went camping for Paul's bachelor party. On our first night, while we were hungry and waiting for the food to arrive, he grabbed his fishing pole, went straight to the creek, and began hauling in little pan-fish to immediately put on the fire. He was hauling them out faster than we could cook them. Throughout the weekend, he was telling us everything about Mohican Park, sharing stories of past trips, and even took us on a nature hike to some of the most spectacular views the place had to offer. I had the opportunity to talk with him a little about life, fishing, his future son-in-law and how he wouldn't allow Paul to call him "Dad" until he officially married his daughter, and so much more.

By the end of the trip, before we all left, he brought us all in a circle to pray for each other, the time we shared, and our lives going forward. He then wanted to acquire everyone's contact info to get the gang back together in the near future.

I saw him three more times after that and each time was as special as the first. He was filled with joy pride, and mirth at his daughter's wedding, he personally thanked me at the labor day conference for writing about Paul and Sarah's wedding and told me I had talent, and he was all smiles and upbeat working at Ashland woods three weeks ago after hours of hard manual labor. That was the last time I saw him.

Even though I knew him for a mere four years, his life impacted mine more than he'll ever know. Just looking at him was an inspiration in its own right. Mr. B. was a man who by my standards had everything he ever wanted. He had a loving wife and three amazing kids, a heart fully for Christ, a life where he embraced the joys more than the pain, a life that impacted so many around him, and took each day as it came, refusing to miss out on the pleasures that came with it.

For me, I want to strive to reach this standard. Sure, I really want to get married, have kids, grandkids, and die in old age. But that's not up to me. That's up to the God who created me, who gave up everything for me, and would do it again and again, and again no matter how many times I would spurn him and walk away. To be able to say I lived for Christ, to have saved people from eternal death, to be someone, like Mr. B., who made an impact on the lives of those around me, would be enough to say I lived life to the fullest. I have zero doubt that the Lord will carry us all through this difficult time. For now the tears may come, but the joy will one day return, knowing Mr. B. lived a happy and full life and is now in the best place anyone could ever be; in the arms of our Savior.

Here's to Brian Brickner, husband, father, friend, uncle, brother, and so much more, and the Christ-filled life he lived, knowing that we will see him again one day. May the grace, mercy, and peace of the Lord be with you all.

Hollywood's Noah: A False Portrayal

Being a Christian and growing up knowing the classic stories of the Old Testament that every kid who went to Sunday school classes should know, naturally I wanted to watch Hollywood's take on Noah. Now I knew going into it that it wasn't going to be completely accurate and that Noah's character was going to be on the extreme side, but I was in for a shock at how much Hollywood skewed the story. As I sat there watching it, I cared less and less about how well the movie was made, how well the actors performed, or how well the dialogue was written. I became livid at just how wrong Hollywood was. With all that being said, I am going to spoil the heck out of it by pointing out all the inaccuracies and my thoughts on their portrayal. If you really want to waste your time like I did, stop reading now.

SPOILER ALERT: (Hollywood's take) 1. The whole movie is set at a much earlier setting than the Bible records. None of Noah's three sons have wives, Shem has a girlfriend, Ham is barely of age, and Japheth is just a young boy.
2. The Watchers (cursed angels that tried to "help" man) were enslaved by mankind and were convinced by Noah to help him build the ark.
3. Shem's girlfriend can't conceive and is miraculously healed by Methuselah.
4. Ham tries to take a young girl onto the ark, but she is abandoned by Noah and killed by an angry mob trying to kill Noah and his family.
5. The Watchers are "defeated" defending the ark and released back to heaven.
6. Noah's family makes it onto the ark and Noah shuts the door.
7. The leader of the mob successfully gets on the ark and is hidden and cared for by Ham.
8. The mob leader starts eating the animals to survive.
9. Noah looks at his situation, seeing that there are no wives for his sons and Shem's girlfriend is barren (he doesn't know she was healed yet) and believe's God spared them so they could die a natural death and that God really wanted mankind to ultimately end.
10. Noah finds out that Shem's girlfriend is pregnant and determines that if the baby is a girl, he will kill her so she can't become a wife for his sons.
11. Shem's girlfriend produces twin girls, which is exactly what's needed for Ham and Japheth to have a wife. Noah still wants to kill them.
12. Ham and the mob boss conspire to kill Noah (Ham wants revenge for the girl Noah abandoned). But as Noah and the mob boss struggle, Ham kills the mob boss.
13. Noah goes to kill the twins in their mother's arms, but drops the knife and walks away.
14. They include the drunken Noah scene. He is passed out in a cave and does not curse or bless anyone.

Biblical Truth: 1. When they enter the ark, all three sons have wives. Gen 7:7  "And Noah and his sons and his wife and his sons' wives with him went into the ark to escape the waters of the flood."

2. There is no mention of Watchers anywhere in the Bible. The only thing that comes close are the Nephilim and there was no mention of them helping or being enslaved by man. This is all that the Bible says on them: Gen 6:4  "The Nephilim were on the earth in those days, and also afterward, when the sons of God came in to the daughters of man and they bore children to them. These were the mighty men who were of old, the men of renown." This is a harder topic to understand, but the clear thing is there were no watchers.

3. Point one refutes this because Shem had a wife and there is no mention of her being injured or being healed by Methuselah.

4. Again point 1. Ham already had a wife and she was brought on the ark.

5. See point 2.

6. Noah did not close the door. Gen 7:16  "And those that entered, male and female of all flesh, went in as God had commanded him. And the LORD shut him in."

7. No one other than the animals, Noah, and his family were on the ark. Gen 7:13  On the very same day Noah and his sons, Shem and Ham and Japheth, and Noah's wife and the three wives of his sons with them entered the ark." Gen 7:23  "He blotted out every living thing that was on the face of the ground, man and animals and creeping things and birds of the heavens. They were blotted out from the earth. Only Noah was left, and those who were with him in the ark."

8. The Bible makes no mention of eating the animals, but rather to keep them alive.Gen 6:19  "And of every living thing of all flesh, you shall bring two of every sort into the ark to keep them alive with you. They shall be male and female. 

Gen 6:20  Of the birds according to their kinds, and of the animals according to their kinds, of every creeping thing of the ground, according to its kind, two of every sort shall come in to you to keep them alive. 

Gen 6:21  Also take with you every sort of food that is eaten, and store it up. It shall serve as food for you and for them." 

9. This was the part that made me the most angry. Noah knew from the beginning that God was sparing him and his family to start over. If not, why save them? This was an awful Hollywood concoction. Gen 6:17  "For behold, I will bring a flood of waters upon the earth to destroy all flesh in which is the breath of life under heaven. Everything that is on the earth shall die. 

Gen 6:18  But I will establish my covenant with you, and you shall come into the ark, you, your sons, your wife, and your sons' wives with you. Gen 9:1  "And God blessed Noah and his sons and said to them, "Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth." 

10. The Bible does not mention babies being born on the ark. And Noah was not a baby killer.

11. See point 10.

12. See note 7

13. If you want to compare this to God asking Abraham sacrificing Isaac, the difference is God told Abraham to do it and then stopped him. In the movie, Noah get's the revelation on his own and stops himself. I absolutely loathed this part of the story line.

14. They even slipped in the only sin mentioned about Noah and they couldn't even get that right. He had vineyard and passed out in a tent, not on a beach in a cave. Gen 9:20  "Noah began to be a man of the soil, and he planted a vineyard. 

Gen 9:21  He drank of the wine and became drunk and lay uncovered in his tent." Also he didn't curse Canaan or bless his sons in the movie, but the Bible tells us that he did. "Gen 9:24  When Noah awoke from his wine and knew what his youngest son had done to him, 

Gen 9:25  he said, "Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be to his brothers." 

Gen 9:26  He also said, "Blessed be the LORD, the God of Shem; and let Canaan be his servant. 

Gen 9:27  May God enlarge Japheth, and let him dwell in the tents of Shem, and let Canaan be his servant." 

So there you have it. Now you know why I hated it. But in all of it's flaws and garbage, there is a blooming flower. It may get Christians to dust off the Bible to find the flaws on their own by causing them to read it. It also may make unbelievers curious and cause them to read the Bible as well. 

Verdict: If you know the story of Noah inside out, don't watch the movie. It's a waste of your time.

If you are going to read the Bible to find the flaws on your own, then by all means watch it.

If you want to watch it for fun...well, with all the inaccuracies aside, the movie wasn't well done in terms of filming, dialogue, etc. So it's your loss if you chose to watch it.

 

Reflections From North Carolina

During the 2011-2012 internship, I had the chance to go spend a week in Cody Hayslette's neck-of-the-woods in North Carolina. That week was easily one of the most memorable moments in my life. Ever since then I have been writing that experience down so when I'm old and gray (if the Lord allows me to reach that stage) and my memory is failing me, I could read it and recall those wonderful times with those wonderful people. So without further ado, I give you my adventure in North Carolina.

                Traveling is one of many passions of mine. So much so in fact, that I have made lists, studied places, written, and dreamed about where life could take me next. One such opportunity fell upon me during my 1-year Christian Internship. A good friend and fellow intern Cody Hayslette offered a trip to his home town nearly Raleigh, NC over winter break. One of my many travel goals is to set foot in all 50 states. I was going on this trip and nothing was going to stop me…or so I thought.

            The trip wasn't happening until the first week in January so I had to weeks to prepare. All I thought about then was relaxing and doing a whole bunch of nothing when I got back to my apartment…but then I got a text. It was from my sister and I had seen her only a half an hour ago so I knew whatever it was it couldn't be good. My hunch proved correct. A flashy piece of mail arrived that day at my parent’s house summoning me for jury duty. But this wasn’t any common jury duty. It was in fact a Grand Jury summons meaning larger cases and was near impossible to avoid. My heart fell so fast and so hard that you could hear the thump in Thailand. My state of being went from shear happiness to straight up depressed. Not only was I almost guaranteed not to go to NC, but if I was selected for a jury, I may have had my internship experience ruined.

            If this had happened to me a number of years ago, I would’ve thrown in the towel, called it quits, maybe even kicked a bucket (with my foot…see what I did there?). However, I still had hope. One of the first things I did was pray. Let me tell you this now. Prayer can do wonders. With man impossibility lingers, waiting for its moment to pounce, but with God, that word doesn’t even exist. Also keep in mind that God knows what’s best for you and knows when to give you what you need. So if you pray and don’t get a response right away, don’t give up or be discouraged, because even the best things in life take time.

            No one likes jury duty, but it is one’s duty as a citizen of these United States. There is never good timing for it, but there is the worst possible time it can occur. I was upset that the NC trip may be gone, but I kept thinking about what would happen if I was actually selected. I thought about all the time I would miss during the internship. I couldn’t understand why the Lord would allow something like this to happen to me. Maybe it was to amp up my prayer life, maybe it was to see His glory, or maybe it was to show me that things like that in life don’t always come so easy.

            Here’s where hope came in. I asked a leading brother in the church/coach of the internship to write a letter describing what I was doing and why jury duty would severely interfere with this internship. I also wrote a personal letter as well to provide my input rather than having someone else do all my work for me. I preceded to fold the letters, lick the envelope, place the stamp, and pray.

            The week before we were supposed to leave, I was in that frozen land up north that they call Canada for the first few days and had no access to a phone, email, or snail mail for that matter. Plus who knew when I was going to hear back from the Justice center? All I had was faith.

            The border always gives my nerves a twitch. Even though I’ve done nothing wrong, the whole process just makes a guy think he’s under the microscope. I sat there silent as a snowflake landing on a windowsill. After another five torturous minutes, the border guard gave us back our passports and we had safely returned to the good ole U.S.A. As soon as the little “roaming” triangle on my phone disappeared, I accessed the internet and checked my email. Lo and behold, out of the twenty or so Facebook notifications, there in the heart of them all, was an email from the justice center. I opened that email so fast I’m surprised my finger didn’t go right through the phone. I had mentally prepared myself for this moment. I was braced to hold back the Pacific Ocean if I had to. There were only two lines. What I saw made my jaw hit the floor.

            “Your request for dismissal from jury service has been processed. You are no longer required to appear on…” I cannot describe to you how great of a joy overwhelmed me and how my heart had been flooded with mirth. This wasn’t just a get out of jail free card be a key to complete freedom! This meant I didn’t get deferred to another date, but that my name would be removed and tossed back into the pool for random selection later on. I thanked the Lord right then and there. Prayer is powerful and the Lord is merciful. I then called Mike and told him the good news followed by a text to Cody telling him I was good to go. I was NC bound.

            On the morning of Tuesday January 3^rd, Paul Mann, Peter Elhardt, Zane Biddle, Ben Carbrey, Kai Zhong, and I loaded ourselves, our luggage, a cello, and a French horn into James Reinarz’s van (which he so graciously lent us for the trip). Brenna Robinson was also tagging along at least until we dropped her off in Charleston, WV.

            It was a beautiful Cleveland morning. The sun was not shining, the air was not warm, and you couldn’t see 10 feet in front of you because of the blinding white crystals that seem to call Cleveland their migratory home winter after winter. We were packed like sardines and had a 9.5 hour drive ahead of us. This was going to be one long road trip.

            I guess the college conference beforehand wiped us all out because most of us were zoning in and out of consciousness within the first hour or two…but not I. For some reason I cannot sleep in vehicles. It just does not happen. Plus Peter Elhardt was driving in blinding snow. Now here’s the crazy thing about northern part of Ohio (mainly Cleveland), the weather is horrible. It’ll be 65 degrees one day in the winter and then 10 below and blinding snow the next. It also didn’t help that the police were out everywhere because you can get a ticket for driving the speed limit in bad conditions.

            Finally, we had reached the southern border of Ohio, and magically, the rouge blizzard was gone, there wasn’t a single state cruiser in sight, and Bach’s compositions filled the van. That’s another funny thing about Ohio; as soon as we crossed the border into West Virginia, there were no officers in sight, even all the way to North Carolina. I guess it’s both a blessing and a curse, depending how you look at it.

            Entering WV is always a welcoming sight. You leave behind the flat lands of Ohio and are welcomed by beautiful mountains and a colorful sign above a bridge that reads “Welcome to West Virginia, Wild and Wonderful.” I’ve been to West Virginia twice before. Both times were so amazing that they’ll get their own section later on. This time we were just passing through. Another hour and we reached Charleston. You could tell by the huge golden dome of the capitol building that suddenly appears beyond the mountains. It’s almost as if the city creeps up upon you and then the mountains again conceal it. We got off the freeway and pulled into the city. Happy to stretch our legs and take a much needed restroom break, we stumbled out of the van, some literally as there was a patch of black ice on the ground.

            We had stopped at an office building where a friend of Brenna’s worked who would take her back to Fayetteville, WV. He was a really nice guy and showed us around his office which was pretty cool. After our brief tour, we thanked him, said good-bye to Brenna and headed south for North Carolina.

            The sun had now set and we found ourselves weaving down windy mountain roads until we saw the sign that said “Welcome to Virginia.” Nothing exciting happened here seeing as it only took a little over an hour to cross through the state. All the mountains faded into the distance and the land became flat once again, but this time we were greeted by a new force of nature…trees and lots of them. Now when most people think about coastal, southern states, they think of beaches, water, open lands, etc. But shockingly enough, North Carolina is covered with trees. I remember Ben Carbrey saying as we got closer to Cody’s house, “Cody lives in the sticks!” Thankfully we had a GPS because it was really dark now and all you could see were trees.

            Ten hours total traveling time later, we heard a joyous sound come from the GPS. “You have reached your destination.” We pulled into the driveway of this huge house which, believe it or not, was in a clearing with a house on either side with no trees blocking its view. We got out of the van and stretched. I had texted Cody 10 min before, but there was no one there to greet us when we arrived…or so I thought. A bright light was coming from the back of the house, so I wandered over there and sure enough, there was Cody, Sam Huoh, Thomas Brown, and Renee Berglund all in Cody’s giant shed. Finally noticing our presence, they came and greeted us and then we all wandered back to the shed.

            Lying before me was a giant piece of plastic tarp and rope. The four mentioned above were working on a “Project” that would later be tested during the week. We inquired of them what this project might be, but they were tight-lipped and would reveal that answer later. After our brief tour of the back, we walked into the well-lit house where we were warmly greeted by Cody’s parents.

            You could feel the warmth and hominess the minute you crossed the threshold. Cody’s parents were more than happy to have us. There were going to be nine college kids in their house for a week and they were already feeding us and telling us to help ourselves to anything and everything. You know that saying “opposites attract”? That statement couldn’t be truer with these two. Cody’s dad was a quiet, soft-spoken, gentle fellow who seemed quite down to earth. His mother, on the other hand, was a louder, fiery, want-to-feed-you-even-though-you’re-full, person who could talk your ear off and had many priceless expressions as well as sweet. She was the perfect example of southern hospitality. Another thing about Cody’s family was that they were close to the point where I saw and met all of them multiple times before the week was up. One example was his cousin Kyle, who hung out with us the entire week. This guy was passionate. He broke his fingers playing ultimate Frisbee and had to wear this removable cast-like support, only to remove it to toss a disc later in the week. More on him and other family members later.

            We (being the nine of us and Kyle) spent the rest of the night pigging out on the snacks and ice cream that was set out for us, playing risk, and chit chatting about how the week was going to look. Finally, between two and three in the morning, we called it a night.

            The sun came blaring through Cody’s window at the early hour of 12:00PM. We stumbled and crawled out of our respective lairs to the kitchen, where there was food prepared the night before for us to chow down on. It was sooo good. We chilled around the house for a while; some practiced their instruments, some caught up on their bible reading, and some just took it all in.

            Trying food was a must in NC and what better way to experience it than the southern fast food franchise called Bo Jangles. They are a fried chicken joint that makes some amazing biscuits and killer sweet tea. If you ever visit the south, you have to make an effort to stop in to one.

An hour later, we were off on our first adventure of the week. Cody was taking us to a nearby athletic center where he used to work so we could get a tour of the place and then go ice skating. I enjoy ice skating, but don’t do it very often because my ankles can’t take that kind of a beating. However, it was totally worth the trip.

            We arrived in good time, laced up, and got onto the ice. I was on roller blades since the age of four, so when I got onto the ice, I began flying, not like the pros, but a lot better than half of those on the ice. I began doing laps, pondering when I should try some tricks, and as I made my first pass, one of the many lovely brothers who had come on this trip was making short, quick, movements with his skates, trying desperately not to fall. I went a few more laps then met up with the ones who were taking a break on the wall.

            There were not that many other skaters there because the public schools had all returned from winter vacation. There was, however, a group of daycare kids there that once they recognized Cody, decided it would be fun to chase him. Cody entertained them for a while, skating circles around them, eluding their T-rex arms, and laughing as the horde refused to back down. Finally, once a few kids “caught” Cody. They decided that their next victim would be Ben. Now Ben is a guy who doesn’t hold back and is full of energy and excitement. He wouldn’t even give those kids a chance. Ben flew all over the rink with a chain of children behind him. At one point, the kids got smart enough to come at him from both sides. Ben being the athletic guy that he is, charged the rink wall and leapt over it. I was a little surprised he did that, but it didn’t faze the kids any. They clamored over to the wall and tried to climb over to get at him. Sometimes you just have to let your inner child loose amongst children because the truth is that kids look up to you and that experience you give them will impact them for the rest of their lives.

            After our “cool” outing, we headed back to Cody’s place the exercise our Second Amendment right as Americans; that being the right to bear arms. For the first time in my life, I got to shoot a gun. It wasn’t just any gun, but rather a semi-automatic shotgun. We were shooting clay pigeons that were released off a foot launcher. The feeling of holding an actual gun, pulling the trigger, feeling the kick, and hearing the blast, was an interesting one. I felt like a true American, but at the same time realized I was holding something very dangerous, especially if used improperly.

            The sun was setting, but our day was far from over. We were all invited over to Cody’s cousin’s house for dinner where we met a bigger portion of his family. There were 20+ people in that house and a lot of…tacos! We had a lot of laughs, swapped stories, and enjoyed each other’s company.

            After dinner, we all congregated into the family room, where Cody’s aunt was passing out hymnals and then proceeded to sit herself in front of the piano. Now we had an ensemble of musicians that had come on the trip so our harmonized singing of classic hymns was a real treat. Cody’s family loved it and we had a blast. We said our goodbyes and headed back to Cody’s house, but our night wasn’t over. Being college kids, we had a habit of staying up until 1-2am playing Risk, Monopoly, watching fail videos, weird Asian films, and eating junk food. Eventually we called it quits, excited at what the next day would bring.

            Day two began nearly the same as it did on day one, but we had different plans this time. We hung around the house a little longer this time and to shake off the restlessness, I decided to test out Cody’s trampoline. Now I love trampolines and have a habit of letting myself go when I encounter one. This one was on the smaller side, had no net, no spring cover, and the weather had given the springs one heck of a beating. Challenge accepted. I immediately began doing flips, rolls, and twists. I then decided to see how high I could get. Each time I hit the surface, I released with more spring and beat my previous height each time. On the next bounce, I exploded into the air with everything I had and then gravity did its job and pulled me back to earth. My legs hit the jumping surface, ready to recoil again, but suddenly they buckled, springs went flying, and I was standing on green grass in the dead center of the trampoline. That’s right, I jumped straight through it and stuck the landing. I walked back into the house and with a sheepish grin told Cody to look outside and see the damage. They all had a good laugh, jokingly said I needed to lay off the ice cream, and said “There goes our safety net!” I will explain that comment later.

            Around 2pm we met up with a brother named Luke. He lived near Duke campus and took us on a tour. Duke has a huge chapel that had some serious architecture including a giant organ above the inside door. Our musically talented people thought it would be cool to harmonize a hymn, testing the chapel’s acoustics. We sang How Great Thou Art to and heard our voices echo throughout.

            Next we went to the famous Duke garden, but unfortunately it was winter time so hardly and flowers where in bloom. Yet, the trees still had some life and we even saw a fearless raccoon literally a foot away. A few of us decided to become pandas for the day and climb bamboo plants. Then in our adventure took us to a mini outdoor theater. We sat on the grass and watched as Ben performed backflips and then myself recite Shakespeare’s 18^th sonnet. Peter Elhardt, the non-Shakespeare fan among us, threw his sandal at me, jokingly (I hope).

            We eventually left Duke and went over to Chapel Hill to take a brief tour of UNC and NC State. On UNC’s campus there was a water fountain that claims that whoever takes a drink from it will get straight A’s…yet to be proven. There is also an old, tall, crooked tree that actually died, was hollowed out, and filled with concrete so it would always stand. This tree was around at the founding of the campus. We made one last stop at a random building on campus that Cody had climbed up onto when he went there and tied a rag to a pole. The rag was still there.

            The sun began to set so we headed back to Luke’s house where we were joined by more of Cody’s family. Luke’s wife made an awesome dinner consisting of authentic Chinese food as well as Mexican food. It was “mad” good as those in Buffalo would put it. After dinner, we were challenged by Luke’s sun Vincent to a game of ping-pong as well as some foosball. Both games were intense. To end the evening, we played one giant game of Pictionary while being feed a vast selection of delicious ice-cream and pop.

            Day three was a treat for us Clevelanders/Buffalonians because the weather hit 70 degrees in January, but in Cleveland it was bone-chilling cold. So how did we spend it? Sleeping in for starters (no surprise) then dressed in shorts and T-shirts we played some corn-hole and threw a Frisbee. Then we got the bright idea to finally test the parachute we were building. Four of us climbed onto the roof in preparation for the big event. While waiting, Zane and I threw a Frisbee back and forth off the roof because we could. Cody and Sam hoisted the punching bag with attached parachute up a ladder to me and Kai on the roof. Now here’s the kicker. We wanted the max flight time possible so we climbed up to the highest part of the roof. The problem was that the highest point was also the steepest with no flat area to stand. You had to straddle your legs over the roof.

            Someone made sure Cody’s mom would not miss this so they called her out and she started shouting that we were going to kill ourselves, then hold still for a few pictures, then couldn’t watch, then more pictures, then telling us to be careful. Finally, the four of us managed to get the bag in launch position. We counted down to zero and as soon as the desired number was reached, Cody and Sam let the bag fly while trying not to fall. The parachute didn’t open properly, but when it finally did, it caught a corner of the house, missed a window, broke free and hit the ground. Total flight time: Five seconds. Total parachute time: Two seconds. No one died, nothing was broken, and the parachute did open so I’d say it was a success.

            The parachute was far from the highlight of the day. Cody’s sister and cousin had a full day planned for us. They sent us into downtown Raleigh on a scavenger hunt. This adventure took us into the science museum and the museum of natural history. I normally think scavenger hunts are for little kids, but when a group of well-weathered college people run around a museum acting like children, chaos turns into a brilliant comedic act that leaves lasting impressions on my mind. Plus there were prizes on the line!

            My group consisted of Ben, Zane, and Peter. I couldn’t ask for a more entertaining group, well minus Cody of course. Some of the many hilarious challenges included hugging the sad woman, high-fiving girl scouts on the wall, freaking out in front of a wild boar, being spiritual by the praying mantis, milk the giant cow, and find as many NC’s as you can (bonus points for funny expressions). It was intense and we spent the entire afternoon completing many more silly challenges. Once our time was up we headed back to Cody’s house to eat some more southern cooking and then judge (and laugh) at all the pictures from the day’s events. We all were nearly in tears from laughing so hard. In the end, our team came in third, but we had a blast and got candy to boot.

            The day didn’t end on that note, but rather on one with a more divine tune. Justin Hayslette and his then girlfriend, Alora, had come home to visit. It was so good to see Justin. I really missed him. The weather outside was perfect for a game of manhunt and since the neighbors were either not home nor had houses within earshot, we could be as obnoxious as we wanted. We spent the next hour or so zipping all over the Hayslette’s property and the neighbor’s as well.

One point during the game, I was lying on the ground staring at the clear night sky, the millions of stars, and a full moon. I began to let my thoughts wander and take in the beauty of it all. At that point, I didn’t care whether I was found or not. I was enjoying the view and reminiscing on the good times. I won’t forget that moment.

 Now here’s the comedic part of it all. Apparently, the owners of the next house over weren’t home, but their daughter and her friends were. They were freaked out by dark figures dressed in all black racing through their yard and kept flipping the porch light on and off to try to catch a better look. I stopped and revealed who we were. Their faces looked relieved.

            We wrapped up our game and invited them over to join us all around a fire that had been freshly made. Cody busted out his guitar and was singing whatever he felt in the mood for. We joked, laughed, swapped stories, and stuffed our faces with s’mores. Suddenly, I felt a stirring inside me to say something to the neighbor girls who were chit-chatting about things teenage girls talk about. Even though I was on a break from the labor, that didn’t mean I was on a break from Christ. So I began asking them about Jesus, this life, the future, etc. One of the girls said she was a Christian and the other two were more difficult because anything I asked them about God, the bible, or Jesus seemed to turn into a topic of friends, boys, or shoes. After getting nowhere, I thought that was a bit of a waste, but it wasn’t until Alora got my attention that my hope rose again. Apparently she had been listening the whole time and began asking questions. Paul Mann and Cody jumped in and all three of us preached the gospel and had a good conversation with her. Eventually we had to agree to disagree, but you never know what the Lord will do with what you give Him (Alora became saved a year later…that’s another story).

            Day four was less of the site-seeing and more of some good old fashioned fun. We once again ventured from the Hayslette’s humble abode and made our way to Adventure Landing. Here we found ourselves zipping around in go-karts, putt-putting like pros, and trading in our hard earned cash for tokens to win tickets for very cheap prizes. Kyle had a knack for the spinning light game called “Cyclone.” You put in one token and try to stop the revolving light on the jackpot spot. He kept feeding the machine tokens and nailed the jackpot at least five times. With all the tickets that were accumulated, we were able to split them among the group for prizes bigger than just candy. I ended up with a giant pair of sunglasses.

            Once our fun was had, we headed back to Cody’s house for the weekly young people’s meeting. All the kids, teenagers, and high school grads we met throughout the week and then some were there. We enjoyed the food, the instruments, the singing, the young people, and especially the Lord. The night ended with Cody’s mom wanting to kidnap us and keep us because we were leaving tomorrow.

            Our last day was Sunday morning. We were privileged to meet with all the other saints in the area including a group from Bangladesh. As part of the meeting, we shared our testimonies and enriched the saints as they had enriched us. Before we left, we had a love feast (southern style!) with plenty of delicious food. There were four long rows of tables; two for main courses and two for dessert. Afterwards, we said our good-byes and made our way back to New York and Ohio. The car ride home even had a highlight or two. Zane convinced Peter to let him turn on the Steelers/Broncos wild card playoff game featuring Tim Tebow. It kept cutting in and out as we were driving through the West Virginia Mountains. At one point, it cut back in right at the moment where Tebow connected with Demaryius Thomas in OT for the game winning TD. Paul looked back at me and clenched his fist in victory so Zane wouldn’t see it and Zane said ‘Wow…Well that’s that. Go Tebow!” We also managed to make a 9.5 hour trip 8 hours total with a dinner stop included.

            I won’t ever forget this experience I had with these people because it was honestly one of the best experiences of my life. I saw the Lord move in ways I hadn’t before, met many awesome people, experienced North Carolina, and now will have more stories to tell my children and grandchildren. Here’s to the next adventure!

A Window Into My Soul

Two days ago two things happened that got me thinking about why I am who I am and how I got here. And for some strange reason, I get an uncontrollable itch to put all this personal stuff on a blog for the world to see, yet hardly ever bring it up in a conversation that is perfect for this sort of thing. I guess that's the writer in me screaming to be used and heard ever now and then. Stop. Rewind. Back to my opening thought.

For Thermodynamics (I hate this class a lot), we took a tour of CSU's HVAC system which is the system that heats and cools the entire campus. We got to see the massive pipes, coils, chillers, and a bunch of other systems that were noisy and surrounded by concrete. Being blunt, I was bored and not very impressed. We then went from basically the basement all the way to the 20th floor where we saw more coils, metal, and rooms in dire need of repair. I briefly looked and then moved on. My only thoughts at this point were that I was thankful not to have to sit through a two hour lecture on things that make my head hurt. But then I stepped through a small opening and onto a balcony. This balcony was at the very top of Rhodes Tower. Which is the very tower the has the emerald green CSU letters plastered on the side and can be see entering and exiting downtown Cleveland. For years I had always looked up and wondered what it would be like to be up there. Now here I was staring across Cleveland, the city on a Great Lake, with an amazing view. Eight years ago, I never would've ever stepped out there, let alone even going up to the 20th floor.

If you read my June 8th post, you would know about my anxiety, how bad it was, how it trapped me, and how it ruled me (if you want all the details, go read that post). You would also see how I overcame it and how my life has changed ever since. Now I long for adventure. To explore places unseen, to scale heights, to take a ride on the wild side, to travel to foreign lands, to do the exact opposite of what anxiety once told me I couldn't do.

I also know how short life on earth truly is. I constantly feel like I'm three years behind where I should be which puts me now on the edge of 2011...and it's almost 2015! Maybe that's why I'm so nostalgic. All it took was a step out of the race we call human and glance at what I were missing. It's why I like to be with those I call friends. It's why my memory is strong because I never want to let those moments I shared with y'all fade. It's just who I am.

For those of you who don't know, I have lost two friends in two consecutive years. In both cases, my fears came true. Both of them I was thinking about and had not seen in awhile, one much longer than the other. In those moments, I had been longing to spend time with them, because in a way, I wasn't as close to them as I would've liked, but they still meant a lot to me. Every missed opportunity I had to see them was like a tiny thorn in my side. Because for me, I live with the thought that if I'm not going to see someone for awhile, it may be my last. In both cases, that's exactly what happened. Even though I didn't show it, it ate me up inside. There are people from my life in PA that I haven't seen in 11 years and had missed opportunities because that's how crazy life is. It's one the major reason I fight to go to every Vision Week, every college/regional conference, or any other group event. It's because there will be people there that matter in my life and it's the time I am given to spend with them all. Family, friends, and brothers and sisters in Christ matter to me. And to anyone who ever said you can never have enough friends, I applaud you.

Getting back to the second thing that happened to me that caused me to write this post. I was video surfing on Youtube and I came across a video of a famous youtuber which was an abnormal video compared to her normal ones. It was a video in which she was thanking her fans through video clips of her life from when she started on youtube until now. It showed her just being herself and loving life and sharing that human experience with the world. Because she made that choice, it changed her life in ways she could've never imagined. All because she wasn't afraid to grab life by the horns, not let haters phase her, and doing what she loved. But she couldn't have done it without all those who supported her along the way. So where am I going with all this? Let me be open again. I don't enjoy school. I hate having to take classes I don't like, paying money for classes that are insanely hard with professors who just don't get it or barely speak English, tests upon tests, upon tests to "prove" you know what you are doing, etc. In at least four classes (and there's probably more), I lost an A on a test or overall grade because I made a simple error or was given the hardest possible questions, and the professors saw it fit to take off enough points to cost me a B or an A. It made me question why I even tried so hard or why I even took up engineering in the first place. Because grades only matter for school and scholarship. The majority of employers will not care that you never got a C. All they care about is that you have $40,000+ piece of paper that says you're qualified. Even if you are skilled or talented enough to be what they are looking for, if you don't have that piece of paper, you don't get the job.

I'm an outgoing, adventurous person who wants to experience so much while I am young and as long as I make enough money to support myself and a family down the road, I don't care one bit about making a penny more than that. I chose engineering because I like to tinker with things and create new things. Not for the money. I trust Jesus Christ in that department. Professors keep telling me I should get my Professional Engineer title (P.E.) because it's that great a difference between decent money and a boat load. But for me that means another 2-4 years of school and two 8 hour tests...yeah that's not happening...ever. All I want right now is to enjoy those around me and experience all life has to offer before a full time job is a must. Oh and for that year I took off school to serve the Lord. I don't regret it and you can take that to the bank.

So I apologize if it may have seemed like a rant, but I had to get that off my chest. And for those who skimmed it I don't blame you. In short, life is short and family and friends make life a whole lot more worth it. Do what you gotta to to get where you gotta be, but don't let time steal precious moments from you. Let go and let God. Until I see y'all again, may the Lord bless you always.