Just Say Yes

I screwed up. The month of May ends tomorrow. In order to fulfill a commitment goal I made to myself upon starting this blog nearly 8 years ago, I needed to post something this month. All day my brain was running amok with ideas. I had finally settled on one. As I went to write it, my heart sank. There, next to the title of my April post, in orange lettering, was the word D-R-A-F-T. I went out of the editor and to my actual blog page. There was no April post. I panicked. I cursed the connectivity issues I remember having that night and the page assuring me my post had published. Then I remembered that I still did write the post, just no one else could see it. Now if I were a famous blogger that earned a living or even cashed in as a side job off blogging, you'd better believe I would've made sure the post was published before my eyes gave way to slumber. But the reality is I'm not. And only very few people read this anyway. If I disappear from here for a month, no one says anything. And that's okay. Because this is more of a personal record of my life for me to look back on, but the bonus is that it's public. So please forgive my tardiness and to make up for it, I posted that post that never posted and am going to post this month's post as I was supposed to post it.

Just say yes. No is so much easier to say, but a simple "yes" can open the door to many life experiences worth living. In his song "The River", Garth Brooks sings the lines "So don't you sit upon the shoreline, and say you're satisfied. Choose to chance the rapids, dare to dance the tide"
That's one of my favorite songs by him. And those lines are what I try to live by each day.

There are things in life that scare us, make us uneasy, cause us to avoid any chance of an encounter. While keeping one's distance may be good i certain circumstances, a good number of times, the fear we have keeps us prisoners. I know this we because my captor as a kid was anxiety. I let it rule me. And when I look back upon those days, how I wish my older self would've appeared and slapped some sense into me. So now I'm making up for lost time.

How? I travel when I can. To experience the world is to piece together part of life's puzzle. It's eye opening. And totally worth the money. But I don't stop there. When I was in Toronto many years ago, our youth conference decided to go into downtown and hold a gospel flash mob. It was winter time. It was -10 degrees F. I despise the cold. I could've easily stayed back and not participated. But I did. I froze on cue with 50ish other people holding up sign proclaiming the gospel amidst hundreds of passersby. It was an experience and a memory that'll last for a lifetime.

More recently, in April in fact, I was presented with another opportunity to say yes. I was invited to go to a stranger's wedding, in new york city, and not with a significant other. I was planning on going back to New York sometime this year anyway, but much earlier and for a wedding where I knew no one wasn't a fast yes. But after some brief consideration, I said yes. Now the trip wasn't as smooth as it should've been. A 1.5 hour plane delay on the way in, a cancelled shuttle at the airport in the pouring rain, a missed opportunity to see an old friend, more rain, and a five hour plane delay on the return trip all could've been enough to say it wasn't worth it. But the reality is, the other experiences I had by far outweighed the one previously mentioned. They included, but were not limited to, geocaching in Central Park, meeting up with another childhood friend for a few hours, going to the top of the New World Trade Center at night, walking the entire length of the Brooklyn Bridge at 11:30PM in full wedding attire, meeting, having dinner with, and witnessing an amazing young couple say "I do", and I shared the entire experience with a great friend.

There was something else. Another moment I had the opportunity to say yes even though every ounce of my being screamed no. Right before the wedding ceremony, I was conversing in the lounge with my buddy when a young woman came over and sate not far from us. At a pause in our conversation, she introduced herself. We returned the favor. We spent the rest of the pre-wedding time conversing, laughing, swapping stories, it was great. After the ceremony, we were ushered into the wine cellar for the reception. The entire area was a dance floor, except for the standing tables on the side. I claimed one of those and stayed there, even after the DJ started the tunes.

You see, I had two left feet. And even though I wish I didn't it's enough to keep me off the floor. A song or two had passed, and the girl I had met earlier made her way over to me and my friend. She playfully badgered us to get on the floor. I wanted to say no so badly, but truth is, when a fine looking woman says you need to be on that dance floor, you get your butt on that floor. Yes I looked like a fool. Yes I was now starting to sweat through my hot wedding attire. But did she care...no. Was it worth it...yes. Later on that evening, at the after party in a big hotel room with the Manhattan skyline and the Brooklyn Bridge as a backdrop, I found myself in conversation with her yet again. We talked for a decent period of time. I enjoyed every minute of that conversation. And it never would've happened if I never said yes.

I may never see her again, but that whole New York experience left an imprint on my life. I have many other stories where simply saying yes turned out to be the best thing I had done. So I challenge you. Step out of your comfort zone. Take that leap of faith. And when presented with a choice where "no' is your jerk reaction, just say yes.

The Effect of People

Have you ever stopped to think about how your interactions with people you know have effects on you? How their personalities, likes, dislikes, thoughts, actions, basically the whole nine yards, may rub off on you? A simple example of what I'm saying is this. When you take interest in someone, you begin to care about the things they like and may even come to like them yourself. But how about those that you may be close to, but not in a romantic way? Say a friend for example. Could be one you see all the time or one you hardly ever see, but still care about.

I bring this up because it's been something that's on my mind recently. I've got a really good friend who's really into video games. I'm not a big gamer by any means. But the major one I do play was because of his influence. Or my love for cars. Some of the cars or styles I like are based off a friends knowledge of them.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not saying my likes and hobbies are not my own, but they wouldn't be the way they are without influence. Winter has recently come to an end, except for Game of Thrones fans in which case it has just begun. If you know me, you know for a bona fide fact that summer is my season. And that the cold and I don't get along well at all. After December that also includes snow. As a kid I loved the stuff. The way it calmed the noise around it. Falling silently in the night and blanketing the land in it's frosty, magical array. It meant snow days from school, countless hours of building a snowman army, snow forts, and taking sledding to the extreme. I grew up and have lived all my life where winter makes it's presence harshly known year in and year out. So I should have some affection for it right? Not quite. Why the cold shoulder? Well...

...as I got older, I lost the magic I saw in it as a kid. And being older is the major difference. Because now driving in it has come into play. Not being able to do many outdoor things I love as an adult is another reason. Not having snow days from work doesn't help either. I could go on, but I don't want to sound like I wish it didn't exist...because that's not true either.

You see I had a friend who was very dear to me as a child. And I found out a number of years ago how much she loved the winter. Mainly through social media. Whenever I saw a post from her about how she loved the fluffy flakes, my perspective would change a little. Here was something that wasn't on my hot list, but she adored it. And because she adored it, every once in a while when I was in the elements, I'd begin to grumble, but remember her love for it, and my disdain would fade. And this was while she was still here.

I've written about her before. A few times a matter of fact. If you haven't read those posts, she was a childhood friend who had a great impact on my life that tragically passed in 2014. I'm not going to rehash that story, but if you're truly curious, go back to my posts from June of 2014.

Her birthday was in January. A Winter month. Makes perfect sense. So it's hard not to have her and her love for the winter on my mind around that time each year. But when Spring rolled around, I was overjoyed that it was here, but because it marked the end of winter. Even though I was joyous, I was struck with the thought I'm writing about now. And I was once again reminded that winter isn't all that bad. I honestly don't believe I'd find the few things I appreciate about winter if it wasn't for her. So each year, in the blackness of night, I'll stand in the midst of a silent snowfall. Staring. Not saying a word as the fragile crystals kiss the earth. It's bitterly cold. But I don't notice. I think of her and am thankful for the passion she had for the season. I take in the moment, then eventually return to the warmth of my house. Peaceful. Restful. All for a small amount of appreciation for something that I usually don't find any appreciation for.

There are other examples I could use, but this one is the strongest with me right now. Maybe take a minute to think about your hobbies, passions, interests, loves. And see how much they were influenced by those around you. Then see how your state of being changes.